Solo Aging: Tips, Benefits, and Drawbacks

A growing number of older adults are navigating the aging process independently, without the support of a spouse, children, or close family members. Often referred to as solo agers, many of these seniors welcome a renewed opportunity to embrace independence, create meaningful connections, enjoy personal growth, and shape a life filled with purpose – on their own terms.

According to the University of North Carolina Partnerships in Aging Program, solo aging is on the rise. Nationally, 27% of older adults live alone and do not have children. More Americans are single – since 1980, there has been over a 50% increase in unmarried adults. Fewer are having children – as of 2020, 16.6% of adults over 55 do not have children, and that number is expected to increase.

While many embrace the solo aging lifestyle, it does come with unique challenges. Creating a thoughtful plan is key to continuing a vibrant and fulfilling life. With a plan in place, solo agers can focus on living fully in the present, creating new memories, and reducing anxiety about handling potential emergencies or health issues.

If your goal is to maintain independence well into your 70s, 80s, and beyond, take the time to understand the importance of planning for solo aging and start building your roadmap today. This article will help get you started.

Solo Aging, Defined

Author and Eldercare Consultant Joy Loverde, a Where You Live Matters Advisory Board Member, defines solo agers as seniors who age without a traditional support system of immediate family, such as a spouse or adult children. “Solo agers may have never married, are widowed, are childless, or are estranged from family,” she says. “While they may or may not currently live alone, solo agers anticipate aging independently, which requires a proactive approach to planning for future care needs.”

In contrast, Joy says that people who live alone may have adult children or close family members who provide a strong support network, even if they don’t live together. They may also have the option to live with family in the future and, therefore, may not face the same long-term care planning challenges as solo agers.

The Advantages of Solo Aging

Joy says solo agers are typically those who understand aloneness and emphasizes that aloneness is not the same as loneliness. “Those who embrace aloneness cherish peacefulness and mindfulness and enjoy a life of introspection.”

Solo agers often enjoy distinct advantages that can enhance quality of life. They have a high degree of freedom, allowing them to make choices without consulting or compromising with others. This independence can lead to a strong sense of self-determination and personal fulfillment. Solo agers can build chosen families of friends, neighbors, professionals, and community members who offer emotional support and companionship that often become as significant as blood relations. They also can pursue hobbies, travel, and lifestyle choices that can be more complicated in a family setting.

The Challenges

While a recent AARP Survey indicated that most solo agers were satisfied with their lifestyle, they did report they worried about a unique set of challenges that could impact various aspects of their lives.

Social isolation and loneliness – These are among the most common concerns because they often have a negative impact on mental health and overall well-being
Navigating healthcare  – Without a family advocate, those who are aging solo may struggle with healthcare decisions and access to care, which can lead to gaps in treatment.
Assistance with everyday tasks – A frequent concern is who will help with cooking, cleaning, and transportation.
Financial stability – A critical concern for many solo agers who often lack family members to assist them with retirement planning and financial management.
Financial insecurity – 45% of those in the AARP survey said they feared running out of money.
Securing suitable housing and caregiving services – These can become increasingly complex for solo agers, especially if mobility (and financial) issues arise.

Successful Solo Aging Starts with a Plan

Successful solo aging requires proactive planning and community engagement. Joy recommends a plan that includes:

Building a Support Network

“Solo agers must surround themselves with professionals and focus on industries that will be there throughout their journey,” says Joy. “A trusted lawyer can help steer the process. The team may include a fiduciary or POA, an estate planner, an eldercare attorney who can assist with legal planning, wills, and healthcare proxies and to ensure wishes are honored; a financial planner to help secure their financial future;  and a healthcare advocate to help manage medications and healthcare decisions.”

Think About Housing … Because Where You Live Matters

Successful solo agers live where they are not isolated. They have neighbors. Stores and restaurants are close by. They have access to public transportation. Parks and senior centers are in the neighborhood. There are opportunities to volunteer. “These are things that improve quality of life and help seniors, especially those who are aging alone, stay in the game,” says Joy.

Staying Social

Join organizations (places of worship, civic groups, volunteer groups, service clubs, interest groups, etc.) to meet people for a new social network.

Learning About Area Resources

Local Area Agencies on Aging are an informed source of what and who is available in a particular area. They will have an updated list of all the certified senior advisors, elder law attorneys, licensed fiduciaries, senior living communities, and other senior services in your area.
*See below for additional resources to help solo agers age successfully.

The Importance of Social Connections

Socializing often becomes more challenging over time, especially for those who are aging alone. “You have to push through the ‘I just don’t feel like it’ mindset,” Joy advises. “Pick up the phone, accept as many invitations as possible, and get out there. Staying active and in the game takes effort, but it’s crucial for mental and physical well-being.”

Joy also emphasizes the importance of choosing the right company. “Surround yourself with positive, joyful people, especially older folks who have been through life’s ups and downs and still maintain a happy outlook. Learn from them!”

Senior Living: A Great Option for Aging Solo

Where you live truly does matter and community living offers numerous benefits for solo agers. Senior living communities provide countless opportunities for social interaction. Residents can engage in daily activities and form meaningful connections with other residents and staff members, fostering a sense of belonging – and community.

Additionally, senior living communities often offer maintenance-free living, allowing solo agers to focus on enjoying their lives without the hassle of household chores. With access to care services and a supportive network in place, community living ensures that solo agers have what they need to thrive independently while remaining connected to others.

Additional Resources to Help Solo Agers Age Successfully

Planning Guides
The Complete Eldercare Planner, Revised and Updated 4th Edition: Where to Start, Which Questions to Ask, and How to Find Help
Who Will Take Care of Me When I’m Old?: Plan Now to Safeguard Your Health & Happiness in Old Age

Healthcare Advocacy
Greater National Advocates: https://gnanow.org
Aging Life Care Association: https://www.aginglifecare.org

Legal & Financial
American Association of Daily Money Managers: https://www.aadmm.com
American Association of Trusts, Estates, and Elder Law Attorneys: https://www.aateela.org

Veterans
U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs: https://www.va.gov
LGBTQ+ Veterans: https://www.patientcare.va.gov/lgbt

LGBTQ+
stonewall Community Development Corporation:  https://www.stonewallcdc.org
Stonewall Village NYC: https://stonewallvillagenyc.org
SAGE: https://www.sageusa.org

From Joy Loverde, best-selling author of…
Who Will Take Care Of Me When I’m Old?
The Complete Eldercare Planner, 4th Edition

Where You Live Matters

Where You Live Matters is powered by the American Seniors Housing Association (ASHA), a respected voice in the senior housing industry. ASHA primarily focuses on legislative and regulatory advocacy, research, and educational opportunities and networking for senior living executives, so they can better understand the needs of older adults across the country.